By Rubab Mehboob.
Today I am going to write about very common word used by every single person out there. Whenever you ask someone that what they want to be or where they see themselves after five years or ten years, everyone has same answer that is “they want to be INDEPENDENT ”. Independence is very common word used by youth and parents. What does being independent means? Very basic description of being independent is to take care of your own needs and to make and assume responsibility for your decisions while considering both the people around you and your environment. Being independent does not mean only financial independence rather it has many other sides to ponder upon. Financial independence is one kind of independence which is usually in limelight of discussions but being independent is connected to our mental independence. Being independent means that one should be able to take decisions for himself or herself and their family without any delay or confusion. If someone is not baffled about his or her life goals and they are crystal clear about what they want in their lives, such person is no doubt independent. He is liberated of slip-ups. He is independent in his contemplations.
Ask yourself this question today what does independence means to you? Independence can be that you are not answerable to someone else. You determine your own schedule, values and priorities. Not being a victim anymore. Doing things without manipulation. Manipulation Is very common in our society. Half of our tasks are completed by others because they are manipulated. Everyone practice his or her power on weak ones. Another important factor of being independent is the ability to say no. if someone learns to say no for those tasks or duties which they are not able to fulfill, they are one who are independent in true sense. If one has enough confidence to say no without any fear he or she is independent of manipulation and societal pressure. Independence is basically living productively in the community with freedom of choices. If you are not able to do single task by your own, it doesn’t matter that you have millions in your account but if you are not free to choose or live by your own choice or you are not able to take correct decision in correct time then you are not an independent being. Yes you fall in category of financially independent but you are caged mentally and you are no free.
Independence is not to rebel against your family norms or culture, rather one should be able to take decisions in order to make their family bond stronger. One should be independent enough to make their loved ones happy. Only if you are free and mentally independent you will be satisfied with your life and at the end of day a contented human can make others happy and can handle relations with more care. Independence also means to be strong enough to give sacrifices f6r your loved ones without any fear. Independence is to trust your abilities and yourself. Independent living means the ability to examine alternatives and make informed decisions and direct one’s own life. This ability requires the availability of information, financial resources and peer group support systems. Independent living is a dynamic process. It can never be static because a person’s physical, social and environmental conditions are changing which demands continues struggle.
Independent living is an idea, a concept or a thought process which we need to apply to our life styles. As Elizabeth Semkiw says if a person in prison have only choice that he has choice to eat his food when he got it or he can eat it hour later. He is still practicing Independent living.
Doren Demas says “I feel Independent Living is living independently without the dependency created by an institution. To learn to support your own self is very important. At the end of day you only have yourself to fall back upon. So it’s exceedingly important to learn how to handle your daily routine issues and your other matters. It is much more beneficial to listen to the voice inside yourself rather than the berating opinions of others. In any moment you want to take a decision go for it. It’s better to do wrong rather than doing nothing. It is the big choices we make that set our direction. It is the smallest choices we make that get us to the destination. Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma- which is living with the results of other people thinking. Don’t let the noise of other people’s opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important is to have courage to follow your heart and intuition.
Writer is an English literature student and hails from Islamabad.