By Haider Abbasi
Inspired by the government’s decision to turn the PM House into a university, I have come up with a plan to save Pakistan. Islamabad’s Red Zone must be auctioned off to Malik Riaz to save Pakistan. The time has come for Bahria Land.
What is Bahria Land?
Bahria Land will be a modern amusement park in the heart of Islamabad replacing the boring Parliament, Supreme Court, Presidency and PM Office. The PM and President surely won’t mind moving, while the Chief Justice will be more than willing to move to the WAPDA office considering his deep regard and advocacy for water issues.
Bahria Land will create employment opportunities, generate billions of rupees in revenue, and provide much needed entertainment for the masses (who have been turned into zombies by the mainstream media).
Most importantly, Bahria Land’s revenues can be funneled back into the government treasury to solve every problem that we’ve ever had. Imagine all of your dreams come true in one day and multiply that by a million. That, my friend, is Bahria Land. Because the cash will start flowing in when Bahria Land starts functioning. Visualize this: The Eiffel tower, the Statue of Liberty, The Pyramids, Macchu Pichu, the Great of Wall of Pakistan, and Chichen Itza all in the same place? Who wouldn’t want to go there?
Millions will visit every month. Soon Bahria Land will expand all over Islamabad. Islamabad International Airport will become bigger and better than Dubai. PIA will still be shit, but Bahria Airways will become bigger than Emirates. All our problems will fade away.
You need dams and water? Check.
Gas and electricity? Already there.
Homes for the homeless? Done.
Foreign exchange reserves? $1 trillion.
Current account deficit? Lol, what’s that.
So join hands with me and support the movement for Bahria Land. Do it for the Chief Justice. Do it for Imran Khan. But most importantly, do it for Pakistan.
This article was sponsored by the Pakistanis For Bahria Land movement. Information stated above may or may not be accurate. Bahria Town and Bahria Land are trademarked by Bahria Town Private Limited and the Pakistan Navy. The writer, who may be an idiot, is not associated with the aforementioned entities. The opinions in this article are of the writer only and do not represent the views of The Weekly Pakistan.